Favourite Funny Quotes

[VladTepes]

There are plenty but I'll kick this off with a few from the Goon Show.

"Major, you're not going to run away from the enemy?"
"Well, there's no point in running away from anyone else, is there?"

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Crowd: WE ARE ALL INDIVIDUALS!!
Eccles: I'm not!

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Hercules Grytpype-Thynne: He's made fools of the police.
Seagoon: I disagree, we were fools long before he came along.

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Caractacus Seagoon: Listen to me, all of you
Prisoner: All of me is listening to you

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Moriartus: He says he wants to die rich.
Julius Caesar: And he shall: Give him a bag of gold and then strangle him

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"I've never been so insulted in all my life!"
"Come now, with a face like that? You must have been!"