A Kiwi was washed up on a beach...

[VladTepes]

    

A New Zealander was washed up on a beach after a terrible shipwreck. Only a sheep and a sheepdog were washed up with him. Looking around, he realised that they were stranded on a deserted island.

After being there a while, he got into the habit of taking his two animal companions to the beach every evening to watch the sun set.

One particular evening, the sky was a fiery red with beautiful cirrus clouds, the breeze was warm and gentle – a perfect night for romance.

As they sat there, the sheep started looking better and better to the lonely New Zealander.

Soon he leaned over to the sheep and put his arm around it. But the sheepdog, ever protective of the sheep, growled fiercely until the man took his arm from around the sheep.

After that, the three of them continued to enjoy the sunsets together but there was no more cuddling.

A few weeks passed by and, lo and behold, there was another ship wreck. The only survivor was a beautiful young woman, the most beautiful woman the man had ever seen.

She was in a pretty bad way when he rescued her and he slowly nursed her back to health. When the young maiden was well enough, he introduced her to their evening beach ritual.

It was another beautiful evening...red sky, cirrus clouds, a warm and gentle breeze – perfect for a night of romance. Pretty soon, the New Zealander started to get feelings again. He fought the urges as long as he could, but he finally gave in and, realising he now had the opportunity, leaned over to the young woman, cautiously and whispered in her ear,
"Would you mind taking the dog for a walk?"

[Kiwifruit]

Expect a visit Vlad you have been reported...... 

[VladTepes]

Oh no please don't put Jacinda on to me.
She'll eat all my apples through my fence.