Bane of my life.........

[Granty]

I was at work this morning but had a short shift so had the afternoon off. I looked outside and mentioned that as it was a warm dry day and there wouldn't be many left before winter that I planned a ride out. At which point I heard " you motorcyclists are the bane of my life"
If I describe the lady who made this comment you will all of met one like her. For years she was a normal working class girl who was down to earth and could be described as a "rough diamond". However a couple of years ago she came into an inheritance from a distant relative that she had never met and suddenly talks with a posh accent and tends to close her eyes when talking to you. She starts every sentence with the word "so" and now looks down on us working classes. She no longer goes to Bingo with her friends instead she now has new friends over for a bit of supper. She now wears Hunter wellies, tweed jacket and has bought what she calls a " classic" (OLD) Range Rover. She now calls her parents "mummy" and "daddy" and for the last six months has talked constantly about her "poppy" (horse) that she just had to have. I'm sure you get the picture. Any way when I asked why us bikers where The bane of her life she started to say that while out riding her "poppy" that we are all a bloody nuisance as it spoils her and her friend Henrietta's enjoyment of a little jaunt on their fine steeds and that we shouldn't be allowed on the road.
I replied you mean us bikers who have all passed at least two tests to get a license to be qualified to ride on the road. Who pay insurance to cover us and all third parties in case of an accident. That we pay road tax to be legal and have our bikes tested every year to show that they are road worthy and safe. I asked her whats tests she has to pass to ride her horse on the road, how much her insurance is to cover her, her horse and all third parties while on the road. I asked her what test her horse has to do to show that it capable of going on the road as it is well know that horses can be nervous and unpredictable. I also went on to ask how many horse riders have skidded off having hit any oil deposits left by motorbikes compared with bikers coming off on deposits left by horses that their owners fail to clear away. I went on to ask how often a motorbike holds up traffic because of going slow and riding two abreast.
At this point she returned to her previous working class girl status and not feeling the need to close her eyes when talking in a loud voice with wide eyes told me to F@#K OFF . Such a lady...NOT.
Well at least I gave me a chuckle while out on my afternoon ride while she was at work. Then when she gets home she will have to shovel up her "poppys" deposits. When I asked what she does with the manure she said she bags it up and puts it at her gate and sells it to passing motorists for £1 a bag and then puts the rest on her rhubarb. I replied so you even stop traffic again to sell your shit. And we put custard on our rhubarb. At this point I left as she became very anglo saxon.

[BbigMmac]

Same as the bicycles here in Holland...don't pay road taxes but the screw up all your corners when you are having a nice ride on sunday.

[ARH]

Grrrrrrr.... don't get me started on cyclists!!   

Have to say tho I don't come across many horses here in Austria..... just feckin cyclists!!! 

[Sweaty]

Well said Granty 

[Kiwifruit]

I hear you Granty
My problems have been a car and a truck this week. Been pretty lucky nobody has pulled out on me recently.....untill Tuesday.
The road has just been resealed and is restricted to 50kms, normally 100kms. I let 2 cars pass before pulling out of my drive. The bike is cold so just cruise along behind them. I see a 10 ton dump truck in a driveway to my right waiting too turn right.
So he lets the 2 cars pass then pulls out in front of me. His bumper is well into my lane
This fwits eyes must be painted on.....and l told him so.
Wednesday at a round-a-bout, nothing to my right so l proceed. The bloke on my left and in the 1st of the 2 lanes shoots forward 6ft and stops but the bloke in the 2nd lane goes for it. So l lock up the rear the bike stalls, just managed to grab the clutch and hit the starter.
What is it with these people. Do they look and not see or don't they care? I've a headlight and two bright LED's on.
Im invisible and ride as such. Twice in two days.......ldiots !!
No horses or cyclists involved but l don't disagree with your sentiment about them.

[Sweaty]

Geez KF, lucky you are in one peice.
Bloody morons.

[KiwiCol]

Jeez mate, sounds like it's worse in your neck of the woods for now.   Take care out there mate.

[Kiwifruit]

Yeah Sweaty, long time since l last locked the rear, the front was doing all the stopping.
People are in such a hurry.
And they say we are the problem. 

[Mick_J]

Well said Granty, I used to work with a lady who had a horse and she did ask if I slowed for horses, I said yes but not for the horses or riders sake but my own.  She looked puzzled and asked what I meant so I told her I couldn't give a stuff if a rider fell off their horse and hurt themselves as they should not be on the same road as I pay for but I do slow in case the stupid animal decides to start break dancing anywhere near me without any insurance to pay for any damage to me or my bike, she was not impressed. I have revved up my bike once near horses when a bunch of toffs in red coats were chasing after a little red fox, they were not impressed either.

[Kiwifruit]

I have ridden two horses, I was 16 and still at school for a total distance of .......well lets just say not far, rapidly falling off both times. Hardly the impression I wanted to make with the cute thing that rode them.  Poxy things !!
Many years later I lived in a cottage on a horse stud. One Saturday morning I can hear shouting. Looking out I can see this horse is half out of the stall suspended in mid air. It then fell forward and broke a front leg. Thinking it would just lay down, I was wrong, it tried to gallop off down the race before falling over. There was a lady screaming at me to sit on its head. I did briefly until it flicked me off. It got up again and ran. The poor thing was in a terrible state. Fortunately the vet arrived and quickly put the horse down. Just so sad to see.
Having witnessed that I realize how unpredictable an animal they can be. I always slow down and give them a wide berth.

They are so much more predictable in a can............... 

[BbigMmac]

They are so much more predictable in a can............... 

That's the same for cyclists.

[KiwiCol]

They are so much more predictable in a can............... 

That's the same for cyclists.

I'm not sure they put cyclists into cans of pet food?  Horses on the other hand, yes.

[Sweaty]

They are so much more predictable in a can............... 

That's the same for cyclists.

I'm not sure they put cyclists into cans of pet food?  Horses on the other hand, yes.

They don't, but now is a great time to start